Adventures of a Tofu Slut

I just heard some co-workers talking about me behind my back (although technically it was just on the other side of a divider where they didn't realize I was standing). They were saying completely not the things I would have expected - it wasn't worse or better, just not what I thought. I've been deluding myself all these years!

So now I'm totally curious, which makes it anonymous commenting time! Tell me what you really think of me - the good, the bad, the ugly. Think of this as your chance to say those things that we're all too polite to say to each other's (virtual) faces. Tell me something, whether you've known me for years or just started reading yesterday (although if you just started reading yesterday, I promise, I'm generally much wittier. Or so I think). Think I'm smart? Think I'm cheerful? Think I'm lazy and passive aggressive? Wow, I totally agree with you.

Just, please, keep it anonymous so I don't have to think of polite responses. :D

Now isn't this much better than doing work?

Happy... actually, I have no idea what this holiday is called in Ontario. It's still B.C. day in my mind, although I'm pretty sure Ontarians don't particularly have any interest in celebrating B.C. Maybe each province should get a special day, and make all the other provinces celebrate it. For B.C. day we could smoke pot, scream in terror at the sight of snow, and watch provincial politics flip-flop from the extreme right to the extreme left and back again. Or maybe that's just in Victoria. :D

So let's call it I-Have-The-Day-Off-Work-Today Day. Yay! Although, oddly, I'm actually kind of looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. And not just for the air conditioning. I've been so far behind, but I'm finally getting to the end of my backlog, and I think it's making me work with renewed intensity. I got so much done this week; I've been clearing post-it notes and cds off my desk with abandon. In fact, I had a really hard time sleeping on Friday night because I kept thinking about everything I want to do on Tuesday.

Meanwhile, I've been having a productive AND relaxing weekend. Go me. I have done all sorts of house maintenance stuff, read many books, and spent a very fun afternoon/evening with globetrotter1, eating sushi, people watching on a patio, and talking about books, movies and how people are annoying. Good times. And now I'm watching Lost in Translation and plotting what to make with all the groceries I bought.

Also, apparently it's girldetective's birthday today. Happy birthday! Have some cake for me. Or maybe I'll have some for you. :D

In conclusion, ( I have been tagged. )

It's Friday, therefore I meme.

Take the first sentence of the first post of each month for the past year and make a paragraph from it.

Craziness going on in BC politics. Well, that was a lazy weekend if ever there were one. 10 things learned in one weekend. There will be no April Fools happening here. Happy May, everyone! I tried to follow the crowd and make one of those little icons of me, but it looked nothing like me, no matter what I did. Yay, Fringe! Oh, hello, I love long weekends. I am full of bad news on a very minor scale today: the Chicago roadtrip is off (no Audra and no Min, boo), I haven't seen or talked to some friends in weeks (thus killing my August resolution), I don't have the money to take German in the fall like I thought I would, which renders the September resolution of improving my German slightly more difficult, and my hamstrings are wicked tight. Hello! November already. It started as a conversation about NaNoWriMo and other writing projects in which I expressed my disbelief that anyone could manage to write 500 words a day.

So, apparently I like to announce the coming of the new month and discuss the weekend. Also, I write a lot of very short sentences, except when I don't.

Happy belated birthday linaerys! It sounds like you had fun (and I'm glad you're starting to feel better).

Speaking of feeling better, many of you are sick or going through medical treatment right now, and I hope you all have speedy recoveries and painless procedures.

( I can't believe there are actually 3 other people out there with mmmmpie as an interest )

How is it that I'm the only person with atheist nunnery as an interest? After all, I know some of you took vows. :)

If you...

1. ...owned a restaurant, what kind of food would you serve?

It was long ago decided that any restaurant would have to be a side dish restaurant, in honour of the fact that mostly we want the dessert for the whipping cream, the salad for the salad dressing, and the chips for the dip. sarcasma, this was with you, right? I'm not losing my mind? So, yeah, a restaurant where the menu consists of sauces, dips, spreads and toppings.

2. ...owned a small store, what kind of merchandise would you sell?

Oh, probably locally made kitchy things, although at one point I had grand plans to open a store that sold everything to do with musicals: CDs, sheet music, posters, books, knick-knacks. Of course, then I discovered that if you went to real cities, there actually were stores like these.

3. ...wrote a book, what genre would it be?

Definitely a romance novel. Then I could count all the ones I've read as research. Plus, you know, I always want to read one where the woman is a vegetarian, or has actual good taste in music, so I probably should just write it myself.

4. ...ran a school, what would you teach?

Can't I just run the school, and let someone else do the teaching? Sad to say, I'd probably be a great administrator. I don't know, maybe I'd teach the finer techniques of not being able to make small talk, and how to ignore your co-workers in 5 easy lessons.

5. ...recorded an album, what kind of music would be on it?

Cabaret songs, definitely. And funny songs from musicals.

1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.

Dude, that's soon. I'm going to have to keep them small. Okay, finish learning the choreography I'm working on, clean off my desk, make cookies for my co-workers as a holiday thing, go to at least two craftfairs, run on the treadmill for more than 3 minutes without falling off.

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.

Julia, Jade, Laura, Angie, Marie (friends from high school and the job I had after university)

3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.

Drive stick, speak fluent German, ballroom dance, bake a pie...and suddenly I'm drawing a blank, even though I know there're hundreds of things I'd like to learn. Um, how about do quick household repairs.

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).

Give money to my parents, buy a condo, get said condo professionally decorated, set up scholarships at my various alumnis, go to New York and see every Broadway show I wanted.

5. List five things you do that help you relax.

Read, watch favourite TV shows (Buffy, Sports Night, Absolutely Fabulous, Red Dwarf), drink herbal tea, yoga, and, sadly, eat dessert.

( ooh, look, a Friday five that requires no actual brainwork )

There's just no way to make that seem more exciting.

1. What housekeeping chore(s) do you hate doing the most?

I hate washing the floors. It's not even like we have much in the way of floor in our tiny bathroom and tiny kitchen, but I just dread doing it. I put it off, and put it off, until I can actually dirt patterns on the floor. vestra, if you've ever thought that you had to wash the floors far more frequently than is your turn, this is why. *ducks*

2. Are there any that you like or don't mind doing?

I like to tidy - I get great satisfaction from recycling the old newspapers, and straightening up the coffee table, or making sure everything is put back where it belongs. I don't particularly mind cleaning the bathroom (other than the evil floor), either, although my back always regrets it after I scrub down the bathtub.

3. Do you have a routine throughout the week or just clean as it's needed?

For the summer, while I was living by myself, I supposedly vacuumed every weekend, and alternated cleaning the kitchen and the bathroom weekly. This...sort of deteriorated into "no one is coming over, it doesn't matter if I clean". It's a little embarrassing to admit, but as long as things are tidy, and there isn't random stuff all over the place, I can easily ignore a little grunge, at least when I'm living alone and therefore it's my grunge.

4. Do you have any odd cleaning/housekeeping quirks or rules?

No, but I am easily seduced into buying multiple cleaning products, one for each fixture in the house, even though I'm sure they're all actually the same.

5. What was the last thing you cleaned?

Hmm. I cleaned the toilet and the bathroom sink on Sunday, and wiped down the kitchen counters and stove yesterday.

Friday Five for you:

1. What's the last place you traveled to, outside your own home state/country?

Vancouver in July (assuming home province to be where I live now, not where I'm from). Outside of the country would have been Austin TX in February for the MLA conference.

2. What's the most bizarre/unusual thing that's ever happened to you while traveling?

Perhaps only unusual to me, but last Christmas when I was flying home I fainted on the plane. Then I fulfilled all cliches by not having any idea what had happened or where I was when I can out of the faint. Luckily I was standing right beside the flight attendants at the time, and I got extra cookies out of the deal.

3. If you could take off to anywhere, money and time being no object, where would you go?

London, to see Kit. New York, to see musicals. Victoria, to see my parents and the cat. Germany, to learn German. Sweden, Norway, Finland, Iceland and that whole part of the world. Scotland, Ireland and Wales. Somewhere where they'll feed me and water me and I can lie around reading.

4. Do you prefer traveling by plane, train or car?

How about "anything but bus"? I guess plane, mostly because it's fast and goes long distances. Or train, although I haven't gone all that far on the train. I've never really taken any kind of road trip, other than when I moved, but I can't imagine that the car is all that comfortable of a travel vehicle.

5. What's the next place on your list to visit?

Hopefully New York City this fall, if vestra and I actually get off our butts and make plans. Otherwise, home to Victoria for Christmas.

A topical Friday Five:

1. How are you planning to spend the summer?

Sadly, the same way that I spend the rest of the year: working. I miss the delineation of the seasons that school brings -- I mean, I've worked at least part-time every summer since grade 8, so it's not about not working, but about that change, and then the change of starting school again in the fall.

2. What was your first summer job?

The summer between grades 8 and 9 I worked as a dishwasher at my dad's restaurant (and was paid -- this wasn't forced family labour). I worked pretty much full-time, except for the 2 weeks when we went over to the island as usual (the benefit of working for my dad was that he automatically found someone to cover for those 2 weeks, since obviously I was going on holiday with my parents). I have to say, I hated that job and would never again be a dishwasher. I used to dream every night about washing the floors at the end of my shift. I think it's because of that job that I kind of don't like to touch food (although I still love to eat it).

Sometime around then I also started working at the music store where my mom worked, but it was only very occasionally until the next summer.

3. If you could go anywhere this summer, where would you go?

I'd love to go to New York again, but not in the summer. It'd be too much like the horrendous weather I'm living in now. I'd like to go somewhere where I could be outside without burning or getting too hot -- somewhere breezy where I could sit outside and read my book and be given silly girly drinks. Or Sweden. I always want to go to Sweden.

4. What was your worst vacation ever?

I don't think I've ever really had a bad vacation. I've been on some unimpressive band trips, but that's not quite the same thing. Nope, generally I've been a very satisfied vacationer. Although, now that I think about it, there was one summer trip to the island that was far far too hot, and everyone we knew ended up showing up at the same time, instead of one after the other like we'd planned, so there were about 16 people in one tiny little 2-room cabin. That wasn't so much fun.

5. What was your best vacation ever?

Possibly the 3 1/2 day speed vacation in NYC in 1997, where we managed to not only see New York (Central Park, Empire State Building, Bloomies, a very rain-soaked Chinatown), but also 5 shows. In 3 1/2 days!

Runners up would be Italy last year, Disneyland with friends 5 or so years ago and any variety of summers at the cabin.

Vacations are wonderful things, I tell you. Thank god I'm leaving for one tomorrow. See you all in a week or so, and Happy Canada Day in advance!