Adventures of a Tofu Slut

My mother's particular favorite is to tell me all about whatever upcoming trip is next in excruciating detail. I will here all about the details of how she got a good deal on the car rental, whether each hotel includes breakfast or not and the minute details of everyone she may or may not visit on the way, whether I've ever heard of them or not. Then, six months later (because she is a planner) after she gets back from her trip she will call up and yell at me for not calling my Dad while she was gone. Only problem is she forgot to tell me when she was actually going. She will then give my a blow by blow account of exactly what she ate for every meal.